Romans 8:28 “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”
My blindness proved this promise true in my life. My blindness taught me how God created us to work together as a whole for Him and His work. In no way do I see that as a punishment. I learned to see people without the clutter of visual judgment.
Faith believes in something you can’t see or touch. You just know that you know that you know that you know. Grace is getting what you don’t deserve, and mercy is not getting what you do deserve.
When I was sighted, I lived in such a deep darkness. No words can explain it fully. Today my life is full of light. Do I still have hurt? Yes. But God has taken every experience of my journey—prostitution, addiction, prison time, abuse, violence, all of it—and restored me to such a place that I can now help others. Those very experiences provide me with a point of connection to those trapped in the middle of such lives and those on the other side. I get to help these individuals understand what their lives can truly look like.
God has used all of the trauma and the disparity to shape me in so many ways. He has given me a unique voice to lead others to see the underbelly of our society more clearly and help them find ways to better serve these individuals. He has used my experiences to break my heart for the kinds of things that break His. For that I am thankful.
I have invisible scars I will forever carry, but my God is so amazing that when those things are placed in His hands, He can provide healing, love, and restoration. He can change hearts and mend wounds and hurts. He is far better at it than I am. I mean, let’s look at the gravity of it for real.
God is the Creator of all, the King of the entire universe. If He can forgive my mistakes, if He can wipe my slate clean and see the good in me, if He is for me, then who can be against me? I can’t allow human beings who can’t see me as He sees me to inflict harm to my heart as I follow His path for me. After all, it was not a human being who kept me safe on the streets. It was not a human who recovered me from the hopelessness, disparity, and suffering. It was God. I couldn’t see that while in the middle of it all. But I see it now. He was there. He is why I survived.
Being blind has its challenges. I had to relearn everything I ever knew. However, what I knew was defective; it was broken. I mean, I lived in a park outdoors, digging in trash cans and urinating outside. I slept in dirt and washed with random water hoses as I’d sneak into people’s backyards. So, I missed out on a lot of seeing stuff—like what was in stores, or what “normal” things looked like. But take me to my old hood, and I have the visions engraved in my memory; just as my skin holds my scars, my mind holds my trauma.
Because of many of my experiences on this earth, I truly struggled with hope, love, trust, and faith. However, the loss of my sight is something I see as a tool to draw me closer to God and better understand Him. It helps bring me to a place to receive Him as the guiding eyes in my life.
So my blindness grew me. My blindness helped me see. It truly was a blessing. While it is something tragic to some, something others see as a punishment, to me, it is a gift. I am not saying that living without sight isn’t a challenge. It is a nuisance, for sure. But I have vision without sight. I know many sighted who have not learned to walk in faith, and I know many sighted who have neither vision of hope nor the ability to see. Frankly, it is a much greater travesty to live without the vision of hope than to live without physical sight.
Contact Information:
Christine C. McDonald
636-487-8986
Christine.CryPurple@gmail.com
“Love your neighbor, all of ’em.” -Christine Clarity McDonald
Through The Eyes of Grace – Christine C McDonald
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCEj5RbFpuzjx_CuksAqgyXA/featured
